The Unicorn's Horn
by Topaz
Summary: My version of the fifth book, where 7 American students visit Hogwarts for half the year and 7 Hogwarts students go to America for the second half. I know the American wizarding school thing is WAY overdone, but I've tried to be creative, so please review
1. Chapter One: Pimpled Pigs

HARRY POTTER AND THE UNICORN'S HORN  
Chapter One: Pimpled Pigs  
by Topaz  
  
This is my version of book five, and yes, it does involve American wizard/witch students. I've done my best to make it not completely cliched, and we'll soon find out whether I was successful. The American wizarding school is called Pigpimples (get it? Hogwarts? Pigpimples? Cheesy, huh?). The beginning of the story is probably going to be fairly silly, being written by me, but I'll try to make the ending appropriately serious. Think of this as Harry Potter when J.K. had a bit too much sugar, but just a bit. PLEASE make suggestions.  
  
  
"It's great to be going back to Hogwarts," Ron said happily, plopping down next to Harry in the train compartment. "I kinda missed it over the summer-- well, except for Potions. And homework. And Malfoy. And Snape. But everything else..."  
  
Hermione stroked Crookshanks's head. "Yeah. I had an excellent summer, though. My parents took me to Europe for a month and we went to all these fabulous museums. I learned a lot, and it was fun, of course."  
  
"Of course," Ron echoed, looking rather as though he didn't agree.   
  
Harry grinned. "Dudley gained 50 pounds over the summer. Aunt Petunia's going insane." He sighed. "Of course, it does mean that they didn't feed me anything but Dudley's weight-loss drinks."  
  
Hermione made a tutting noise. "All they'd need is a simple slimming potion, it's very easy."  
  
"Hermione, they're Muggles, they can't make potions," Ron said, rolling his eyes. "But guess what! Percy hinted that there was going to be something interesting going on at Hogwarts this year, like the Triwizard Tournament last year, but he wouldn't say what. I think he was mad because Fred and George won't stop calling him Weatherby."  
  
"I wonder what it could be," Hermione said thoughtfully. "Not the Triwizard Tournament, of course, they wouldn't do that again after what happened last time."  
  
The door slid open, and Neville Longbottom walked in, followed by Fred and George Weasley, who were both strutting like deranged turkeys.  
  
Harry stared. "Fred? George? Are you all right?"  
  
"We're following Percy's excellent example, m'dear boy," Fred said in a stiff, snotty tone.   
  
"Our dear mum suggested that we act more like him, so we are," George added, in the same voice, strutting over to sit down.  
  
Hermione giggled, while Neville looked confused and Ron plain disgusted.   
  
"I say, Ron, dear old chum, shouldn't you be starting to study for O. W. L.'s?" Fred said cheerfully. "Mustn't procrastinate."  
  
"Just what I was going to say meself, chum," George said, slapping Fred on the back. "Jolly good advice."  
  
Ron edged away from them. "Stop it, you're scaring me."  
  
Crookshanks opened one eye, stared at the twins, and leaped out of Hermione's arms, darting out the door.  
  
"You scared Crookshanks!" Hermione shrieked, jumping to her feet and racing out after him.   
  
"Jolly sorry, m'dear!" Fred hollered after her. He and George burst into laughter.   
  
"Did you finish your essay on love potions?" Neville asked, his plump face worried. "I've only got thirteen inches, and it's supposed to be twenty."  
  
"Ask Hermione," Ron said carelessly. "She's written four feet. I've got nineteen inches, but I couldn't come up with anything else to write. Snape's evil."  
  
"We're almost there," George said, checking his watch. "Well, we would be if this bloody hunk of metal wasn't about three hours off. Fred, what does your watch say?"  
  
"Haven't got one, dunderhead," Fred replied.  
  
"We've got about ten minutes," Hermione called from somewhere outside the compartment. Ron rolled his eyes.  
  
"I say, who's up for a game of Exploding Snap?" Fred suggested. "Ten minutes is a long time to sit around doing nothing. I've got a pack here." He pulled a pack of cards out of his trunk and tossed it to George.  
  
Suddenly Hermione burst back inside. "Malfoy stole Crookshanks!"  
  
"Eh?" Everyone looked up.  
  
"He stole Crookshanks!" Hermione was practically hysterical. "After you two goons scared the poor thing he ran out of our compartment and into Malfoy's, and Crabbe and Goyle are holding the door shut so I can't get Crookshanks!"  
  
"I wouldn't worry," Ron reassuringly. "Knowing Crookshanks, by the end of the trip all that will be left of them is a pile of bones and an eyeball or two."  
  
Hermione glared at Ron. "You're not helping matters."  
  
"Look, we'll just go... blast the door open and grab Crookshanks," Fred said, getting to his feet. He switched back to his ridiculous Percy voice. "C'mon, Ron, Harry, George, we have to help the jolly damsel in distress, wot?"  
  
"Bloomin' right, by George," George agreed. "Off we go!" He marched out of the compartment, followed by Fred, a reluctant Ron, and Hermione. Harry shrugged and headed out after them.  
  
Crabbe and Goyle were still holding the door shut when they arrived. Fred motioned for everyone to be quiet and knocked on the door. "'Ello in there," he called in a high-pitched, feminine voice.  
  
"Who is it?" Malfoy's voice asked.  
  
"Snack cart," Fred replied, still in his shrill female voice.  
  
"Open up," Malfoy said to Crabbe and Goyle, and they slid the door open. Fred flung himself through the door, with George right after him.  
  
"Hey!" Malfoy yelled. "What're you doing here? Get out!"  
  
"Not till I get Crookshanks back!" Hermione shrieked, trying to push her way past Crabbe and Goyle. "You give me my cat, you mangy puke-haired creep!"  
  
"Puke-haired?" Ron said to Harry under his breath. Harry shrugged.   
  
"Ha! We've got the rotten scoundrel!" Fred cried, and Harry ducked under Crabbe, then slithered into the room to see what was going on.   
  
Fred and George had Malfoy at wand point, both of their wands aimed at his throat. Malfoy looked nervous, and Harry didn't blame him. Fred and George had absolutely maniacal expressions on their faces.   
  
"One move and we'll blast you six ways from next Wednesday," Fred warned.  
  
Hermione stopped kicking Goyle. "I didn't know you'd read the Enchanted Forest books."  
  
"Is that where it's from?" Fred considered. "Oh. Anyway, Malfoy, don't move."  
  
Crabbe and Goyle, seeming to notice for the first time that Malfoy was under attack, turned and lumbered toward him, then reached over and easily plucked the Weasley twins away. While they were busy doing that, Hermione darted in and started scrambling madly around, looking for Crookshanks.  
  
Ron and Harry joined Hermione, but they couldn't see any sign of the fluffy ginger cat. Crabbe and Goyle effortlessly carried Fred and George outside the compartment and dumped them on the floor, then lumbered back inside and closed the door.  
  
"Oy! Let us back in, you stupid blockheads!" Fred shrieked, pounding on the door.  
  
Malfoy reached for his wand, massaging his neck with his other hand. "You won't find your stupid cat, Granger."  
  
"Why not?" Harry asked.   
  
"Because we put it somewhere you can't get it," Malfoy said smugly.  
  
"If you hurt my cat I'll turn you into bunny slippers!" Hermione screeched at the top of her lungs.   
  
The door to the compartment flew open, and Professor McGonagall stormed in. "WHAT is going on, may I ask?"  
  
They all froze. Fred and George peeped in from behind McGongall.  
  
"Hello, Professor," Hermione said in a small voice.  
  
Professor McGonagall's furious eyes swept across the scene. "Well? What is going on?"  
  
"Potter and Weasley and Granger came barging in our compartment, and we tried to make them leave," Malfoy said sulkily, rubbing his neck.  
  
"They stole Crookshanks!" Hermione said shrilly. "Fred and George scared him and they ran in here, and Malfoy wouldn't let me in!"  
  
Professor McGonagall gave Malfoy a severe look. "Why is that?"  
  
"I didn't know her cat was in here, Professor," Malfoy said innocently.  
  
"You did too, you saw him and you shut the door right after him!" Hermione snapped. "And when we came in you said you'd put him somewhere we couldn't get him!"  
  
"Mr. Malfoy, where is the cat?" Professor McGonagall asked.  
  
Draco Malfoy reluctantly opened his trunk and pulled out a very angry, very ruffled, very vengeful ball of ginger fur and set it on the ground. Crookshanks gave a furious yowl and trotted away, trying to gather some shreds of dignity.  
  
"You said you put him somewhere we couldn't get him!" Hermione said angrily to Malfoy. "The trunk's the first place we would have looked!"  
  
"I lied," he said.  
  
Professor McGonagall pinned them each with a very severe look. "Get back to your compartments and behave for the rest of this trip, or I will personally make you all wish you were never born." She turned and swept out, muttered under her breath that sounded to Harry like "What an impression they'll make on the piggypimples eens."  
  
"Piggypimples eens?" Harry said, following Ron and Hermione back into their compartment. "What's a piggypimples eens?"  
  
"Not piggypimples eens," Hermione said exasperatedly, "Pigpimplians."  
  
"Oh, that makes it all so much clearer," Ron said sarcastically. "So what's a Pigpimplian?"  
  
"A pimpled pig?" Fred inquired as the twins joined them. "Why're you lot talking about pigs with pimples?"  
  
"Obviously they need to get out more," George said. "Not the most interesting conversation topic, if you ask me."  
  
"We didn't," Hermione retorted. "And we weren't talking about pimpled pigs, we were talking about Pigpimplians."  
  
Ron dissolved into laughter. Hermione glowered at him.  
  
"What's so funny?" she asked coldly.  
  
"Hearing you say 'pimpled pigs'," Ron said weakly between snickers. "It just sounded funny, the way you said it, you know..."  
  
"Right," Hermione said angrily, "you're obviously all a bunch of loonies."  
  
"Hermione's had a stressful day," Fred said with mock sympathy.  
  
"Ar," George agreed solemnly.  
  
"So, what are pimpled pigs?" Ron asked before bursting into laughter again.   
  
"You've definately had too many Pumpkin Pastries," Hermione sighed. "Never mind. Pigpimplians- NOT pimpled pigs--" Ron was, at that point, rolling helplessly on the floor, clutching his stomach and laughing, "Pigpimplians are probably people from Pigpimples."  
  
"Oh, that explains everything," Harry said sarcastically. "What's Pigpimples?"  
  
"Isn't it obvious?" George asked. "Pigpimples are pimples on pigs. Pigpimplians are pimpled pigs. It all makes sense."   
  
Ron managed to stop laughing and crawled back into his seat.   
  
"Pigpimples is the American wizarding school," Hermione said, the expression on her face mirroring Crookshanks's when Malfoy had released him. Fred was right, Harry thought, Hermione had had a stressful day.   
  
"American wizar- what?" Ron blinked. "There's an American wizarding school?"  
  
"Of course!" Hermione said, rolling her eyes. "What did you think the American wizards did, sat around and twiddled their thumbs?"  
  
Harry didn't think that statement made a whole lot of sense, but he knew better than to point it out.  
  
"I never really thought about the fact that there are American wizards," Ron admitted. "So why was McGonagall talking about giving the Pigpimplians bad impressions? They're in America."  
  
"Maybe she's gone insane like you lot," Hermione suggested.  
  
"Quite likely," Fred agreed.  
  
TO BE CONTINUED...  
  
At least it wasn't a cliffhanger. Methinks someone spiked Ron's pumpkin juice. Probably Fred or George. Praise enthusiastically welcomed (duh), advice even more enthusiastically welcomed, and flames welcomed not quite as enthusiastically.  
  
To help those of you who find it difficult to review stories, here's a simple guide:  
Name: (Type your name)  
Email Address: (Type or don't type your address)  
I (liked, disliked) your story. It was (funny, cute, sweet, stupid, crappy, suspenseful, cliched) and you are a (talented, pathetic, funny, stupid) person. I am a (starfish, banana, zuccini) and the world is going to (spontaneously combust, explode, dance the macarena, eat me).   
  
Was that so hard? Come on, just type it up... you know you want to... okay, goodbye.  



	2. Chapter Two: A Song of Joyful Harmony

HARRY POTTER AND THE UNICORN'S HORN  
Chapter Two: A Song of Joyful Harmony  
by Topaz  
  
Lots of fluff in this one, but it's a majorly important part because... well, read it.   
  
  
It was definately, Harry thought as he sat down with Ron and Hermione to eat, great to be back at Hogwarts. It was even better to be eating at Hogwarts. Especially when Hermione seemed to have forgotten her former fixation with house elves.   
  
"'Ish ish gudd," Ron mumbled through a mouthful of half-chewed meat. "The house elves have really outdone themselves," he added after swallowing, shooting a glance at Hermione.  
  
She didn't seem to hear. "I wonder what's happened with Pigpimples."  
  
Ron immediately burst out laughing just when he happened to be in the middle of drinking some pumpkin juice. A mouthful of orange liquid shout out of his mouth and into Neville, who was sitting across from him.  
  
"Ron!" Hermione snatched her napkin and helped Harry and Neville mop up his face. "Look what you did!"  
  
Ron looked and promptly burst into even more hysterical laughter. Harry couldn't help but grin himself. Even Neville seemed to find it rather amusing. Finally Hermione realized that her and Harry's napkins weren't helping much, and she sat down, giggling herself.  
  
"Maybe Dumbledore will tell us whatever Percy was talking about," Harry suggested, placing his juice-soaked napkin back on the table. "It might have something to do with--" he glanced at Ron, "--the 'P' word."  
  
Even that sent him off in a fit of laughter.   
  
"Ron, what is so funny about the words 'pimpled pigs'?" Hermione demanded.  
  
"It's just funny," he replied, snickering. "Stop saying it before I wet my robes."  
  
At that Hermione and Harry dissolved into laughter, and Harry accidentally knocked his goblet of pumpkin juice over, sending orange liquid casquading over Neville's plate. He looked forlornly at the soggy meat and mashed potatoes, and then joined their laughter.  
  
Dumbledore coughed. "I believe the house elves put a bit too much sugar in the pumpkin juice," he said mildly, watching the four giggling Gryffindors with amusement. "I have an announcement to make, so I would appreciate everyone quieting down."  
  
Harry, Hermione, and Neville managed to stop laughing, but Ron had to stuff a napkin in his mouth to muffle his giggles. That set Hermione off again. By now all the other Gryffindors were staring at them.  
  
"While the Triwizard Tournament last year was not highly successful," Dumbledore began, "I believe it is important for us to meet wizards and witches from other countries. Therefore, this year the principal of the American wizarding school, Pigpimples--" (Ron laughed even harder) "--will bring a small group of students to Hogwarts for half of the year. Then for the other half of the year a group of Hogwarts students will go visit Pigpimples."  
  
The students began talking excitedly. "When are they coming?" Fred Weasley called over the din.  
  
"Tomorrow," Dumbledore replied. He glanced at Ron, who was clutching his stomach and chortling. "I would appreciate all of you at least pretending to be sane. We don't want to frighten the Pigpimplians."  
  
  
The next day found all of the Hogwarts students standing out in front of the school, eagerly awaiting the Pigpimplians' arrival.  
  
"When are they going to get here?" Ron whispered, elbowing Harry.  
  
"How should I know?" Harry whispered back. "Just be patient."  
  
"I hate being patient," Ron said moodily. "I wish they'd hurry up." Harry agreed.  
  
Something gold flickered in the sky, and Harry's Seeker-trained eyes caught it. "What was that?" he exclaimed, turned around to stare into the clouds. There it was again! Harry pointed the flash out to Hermione and Ron, both of whom had no idea what it was.  
  
The speck of gold grew larger.   
  
"They came in a giant Snitch!" Ron yelped.   
  
"No, a massive Galleon!" someone else shouted.  
  
Soon all of the students were yelling out what they thought the gold spot was. It came closer and closer.  
  
"It's a dragon!" Hermione shrieked. It was.  
  
A giant sparkling gold dragon was soaring toward them, flapping its gilded wings. As it came closer, Harry could see small bright spots- probably the students- on its back. The dragon spiraled above them, sunlight glancing off its metallic scales, then gently floated to the ground.  
  
Ten people climbed off the dragon's back, all wearing brightly colored robes and varying expressions. One plump boy looked about to throw up; two identical brown-haired girls looked delighted.   
  
Three adults were standing beside the golden dragon, but Harry couldn't see what they looked like from where he was. Dumbledore went over to speak to them, keeping a respectful distance from the dragon.  
  
"Wow!" Ron looked deeply awed. "Look at that thing. And we thought the Horntail was big!"  
  
"Ron," Hermione pointed out, "the Horntail WAS big."  
  
"Yeah, but this is cooler," Ron replied. "Hagrid's gonna love taking care of that thing. Wonder how they tamed a dragon? They're the wildest things I ever heard of-- Charlie said they're untamable, and you guys saw what Norbert was like."  
  
"Maybe they use the Imperio curse," Hermione suggested.  
  
"Nah, not tough enough to piece a dragon's skin," Ron said. "Look, they're going inside. Are they just going to leave it out here?"  
  
"No, Hagrid's coming," Harry said, pointing. "Let's go talk to him." They hurried off to Hagrid while the other students filed into the Great Hall.  
  
"Isn't 'e a beauty?" Hagrid said happily, running a hand over the polished scales. "A Saharan Sunscale, desert dragon. Lovely color. Summat wrong, Ron?"  
  
"How'd they keep that thing under control?" Ron asked, careful not to come too close. "Blimey, it could swallow you whole."  
  
"'S a domestic dragon," Hagrid replied. "Bin tamed fer centuries, they're not like British dragons, Sunscales. An' much smaller, usually, they must've used an Enlargement Charm on this'n. Desert dragons are usually small; there's not much ter eat in the desert."  
  
A short, plumpish woman with curly auburn hair and blue eyes hurried up to them. "Sorry to keep you waiting, but I had to get the students settled in," she said. "I'm Professor Trippilyn, principal of Pigpimples. I'll help you with Sunny."   
  
"Sunny?" Ron's mouth dropped.   
  
"Yes," Professor Trippilyn laughed. "Is there something wrong with the name?"  
  
"He's a dragon!" Ron said.  
  
"She's a female dragon," Professor Trippilyn corrected, "and she doesn't seem to mind her name. It's short for Sunfire." She reached over and swung up onto Sunny's back. "Climb up, everyone. We can ride her over to Hagrid's and then take care of her. You kids coming?"  
  
"Yeah," Harry said, having looked at Ron and Hermione to see if they wanted to. "We'll help." They climbed up behind Hagrid and Sunfire leaped into the air, jolting Harry's head back.  
  
"Now, let's see... you would be Harry Potter, of course," Professor Trippilyn said. "And you, young lady... that Greek name I pronounced wrong..."  
  
"Hermione," Hagrid supplied.  
  
"Yes, that's it. And you would be the Weasley boy," she said to Ron, smiling at their surprised faces. "Dumbledore and I try to keep in touch. I also know your parents... Ron, is it?" Sunny swerved and then landed, spreading her huge golden wings as she drifted to the ground.  
  
"Yeah, it's Ron," Ron said, his face now a pale green. Harry decided that Ron probably hadn't enjoyed the ride much.   
  
"Airsick?" Professor Trippilyn asked, noticing the color of his face. "Yes, well, I'm used to riding her by now... so, we need to feed her and then, Hagrid, if you wouldn't mind giving her a bath, I'll have to go greet the students soon."  
  
"What's she eat?" Ron asked palely.  
  
"Humans," Professor Trippilyn replied, grinning at his expression. "Don't worry, Weasley, I was kidding. She eats meat... Hagrid, I believe Dumbledore ordered a large quantity of beef this morning?"  
  
The dragon ate quite a lot of meat, which they had to lug over to her. By the time Sunny was sated, Harry was exhausted, and he smelled like a steakhouse.   
  
"Er, Professor, could we pop into the bathrooms and wash up for a minute?" Hermione asked, wiping her forehead.   
  
"Excellent idea, Hermione," Professor Trippilyn agreed. "I really ought to as well. We'd better hurry up, though, the students are waiting." She set off toward the castle, brushing twigs out of her curly auburn hair.   
  
Ron looked half-dead. "Remind me never to feed a dragon again," he said to Harry and Hermione. "Especially one that really does eat humans."  
  
  
Everyone stared as they slipped into the Great Hall and sat down at the Gryffindor table. Professor Trippilyn went to stand by Dumbledore, and Harry saw the seven students sitting in a row of chairs before the Hogwarts students.   
  
"Please welcome..." Dumbledore stressed the word 'welcome' while staring pointedly at the Slytherin table, "...Professor Tira Trippilyn, Headmaster of Pigpimples,"   
  
"Hello," Professor Trippilyn said succinctly. She looked quite a bit neater than she had after feeding Sunny, with her hair brushed and her face washed. Her black robes didn't show the stains they'd all gotten.  
  
"Hello," the majority of the students called back. The Slytherins had a collective eye-roll.  
  
"First I would like to say that it's very nice to be here at Hogwarts, and I'm glad this transfer program seems to be working out," Professor Trippilyn said, beaming around at them. "I'd also like to introduce my colleagues, who have volunteered to come and see what Hogwarts is like, and to teach you. This is Professor Alan Arkis, Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher and head of the Rattirayl house.  
  
A short, cold-looking man with icy blue eyes stood up and nodded to the crowd, his pale blue robes swishing as he sat down.  
  
"Reminds you of Snape, doesn't he," Ron murmured to Harry and Hermione. "Same warmth and friendliness, all right." Harry grinned.  
  
"And this is Professor Elana Felyn," Professor Trippilyn continued, as the black-robed woman next to Professor Arkis stood up. She had sleek dark hair and catlike green-gold eyes with a penetrating stare that reminded Harry very strongly of a hippogriff. "She is our Divination teacher, and head of the house Felinflyr."  
  
"Divination?" Harry groaned. "Oh, great. Another nutcase is just what we need."  
  
"Harry, you dolt," Ron hissed, "this means Trelawney's going to be at Pigpimples! Rejoice!"  
  
Tira Trippilyn looked at the seven Pigpimples students seated next to the professors' table. "These are the students that have come to visit you at Hogwarts. They'll introduce themselves, and state the house that they're from. Elisabeth, you start."  
  
The brown-haired girl in a sunny yellow robes at the end of the table stood up. "I'm Elisabeth Langley, from Delphindyl."  
  
"Nora, sit down!" Professor Arkis barked. "She said 'Elisabeth'."  
  
The girl grinned and sat down, as another girl who looked exactly like her but was wearing blue robes stood up. "I'm actually Elisabeth Langley. I'm from Delphindyl, as you might have figured out." She sat down, grinning at the other girl.  
  
"My name is actually Nora Langley," the girl said, popping back up. "I'm from Delphindyl, too," She sat down, her face perfectly innocent, while Arkis glared at her and Elisabeth. They both stuck their tongues out at him when he turned away.  
  
The girl next to Elisabeth stood up. She had black robes that matched her long hair and dark eyes. "I'm Syris Frostsilver, from the house Felinflyr."  
  
A tall boy with brilliant red hair and green eyes stood up, his green robes swirling around his feet. "I'm Aduro Ventulus, from the house Dragyndair."  
  
The boy next to him was chubby, short, and freckled, with pale blue robes. "My name is Norf Binkleman, and I'm from Chipplefliff." He tripped while trying to sit down and landed on Aduro, who glared at him while Elisabeth and Nora exploded into giggles.  
  
The girl beside Norf glanced at him and stood up, smoothing her green robes. Both her hair and her eyes were the same color as Harry's- black and green. Unlike Harry, however, she was very pretty. "My name is Misty Darkmoon, and I'm from the house Rattirayl."  
  
"Wow," Ron said, staring at her.  
  
Hermione giggled suddenly. "What about Fleur? I wonder if you'll ask Misty to the dance like you did with Fleur--"  
  
"Shut up!" Ron interrupted. "I'm not that stupid."  
  
"Yeah," Hermione said, "right."  
  
"Well, I'm not," Ron insisted. Hermione snorted.  
  
"I'm Butch Bumblekin,"rumbled the last boy, lumbering to his feet. He was built somewhat like Crabbe and Goyle, but with blond hair and pale brown eyes. His orange robes looked like they would burst any second. "I'm from the house Buffogrim."  
  
Professor Trippilyn smiled. "I believe that's everyone."  
  
"You are dismissed," Dumbledore said. "Go to your first class."  
  
"Great," Ron said glumly, "Potions. With Slytherin. Could life be worse?"  
  
"Yeah," Harry told him cheerfully. "We could still have Trelawney."  
  
Ron brightened. "Good point."  
  
Hermione rolled her eyes. "You two are so- Ouch!" The yellow-robed twin from Pigpimples, Nora, had just bumped into her.  
  
"Oh, I'm sorry," Nora said, as Hermione grabbed a fistful of Ron's hair to balance herself and he yowled in pain. "I wasn't looking where I was going. Well, I was, but I wasn't looking in between me and where I was going. Um... well, I was looking where I was going, but I wasn't looking anywhere else, so I didn't see you. Hey, Elisabeth, did that make sense?"  
  
"Nope," Elisabeth replied. "Hey, what's your name? Girl who Nora crashed into?"  
  
"Hermione Granger," Hermione replied, smiling slightly. "From Gryffindor. I'm a fifth year."  
  
"Who are you two?" Elisabeth inquired, nodding at Ron and Harry.  
  
"I'm Ron," Ron said, rubbing his scalp.  
  
"Do you have a last name?" Nora asked, smirking.  
  
"Oh!" Ron said, starting. "Yeah, I'm Ron Weasley. Sorry, but you just reminded me of my brothers, and I was-"  
  
"I'm Harry Potter," Harry said hastily, trying to keep Ron from making a bigger fool of himself. "We're all from Gryffindor. Nice to meet you."  
  
"Good, you're not stuck up," Nora stated, sounding pleased. "We thought you might be, but we weren't sure." She hurried on before Harry had time to be offended. "Us Pigpimples students are having classes with the fifth years, since the majority of us are fifth years, and they didn't want to split us up. What class do you guys have next?"  
  
"Potions, with Slytherin," Ron replied glumly, starting to walk in the direction of Snape's dungeon. The others followed.   
  
"Really?" Nora sounded delighted. "Me'n Elisabeth have Potions first, too. What's Slytherin like?"  
  
"The foulest, nastiest gits in the school," Ron said bluntly. "Slytherin's the house all the Dark wizards come from. They're creeps."  
  
Nora and Elisabeth exchanged looks. "Sounds like Pigpimples' Rattirayl house," Nora said gloomily. "Where is Potions?"  
  
"Follow us," Harry suggested. "And- just to warn you- Snape will hate you."  
  
"Oh, the oily-haired guy with the dour expression?" Elisabeth grinned. "Well, he'll see what happens when you mess with me and Nora."  
  
"What does happen?" Ron asked nervously.  
  
"Well, nothing much, really, but he doesn't have to know that."  
  
  
"Potter, Weasley, Granger- you're late," Snape said curtly as they entered the dungeon. He ignored Malfoy, Crabbe, and Goyle as they sauntered in a few moments later. "Ten points from Gryffindor."  
  
Norf Binkleman, the chubby Chipplefliff boy, had Potions with them as well. "Hi, Nora. Hi, Elisabeth." He looked past them to where Harry was standing, and sucked in his breath, his eyes wide, staring at Harry's scar. "Hey! Are you..."  
  
"Elvis?" Nora supplied helpfully. "No, he's not. Elvis is a famous Muggle singer," she explained to Ron, who looked bewildered. "And Norfie, hate to break it to you, but he's dead."  
  
"Not Elvis," Norf said irritably. "Are you--"  
  
"Freddy the Mexican Jumping Cow?" Elisabeth suggested. "Honestly, Norf, does he look like a jumping cow? He's not even jumping."  
  
"No!" Norf said angrily. "I'm trying to ask if he's--"  
  
"Doing anything Friday night?" Nora finished. "Well, Norf, that's sweet, but I really don't think he's your type."  
  
"Stop it!" Norf howled. "I just want to know if he's--"  
  
"Yeah, I'm Harry Potter," Harry said quickly, before Elisabeth or Nora could butt in again. "Quick, sit down, Snape looks ready to perform the Killing Curse on us all."  
  
Norf and the twins sat with Harry, Hermione, Ron, and Neville, ignoring the other tables. Norf was glowering at Elisabeth and Nora, but they pretended not to notice. Snape glowered at their entire table.  
  
"Today we will be making Love Potions," Snape announced, his customary sneer firmly in place. "They are difficult to brew, and I highly doubt that some of you are up to the task." He glared at Neville, who dropped his cauldron. "However, competent or not, you will all attempt to create one."  
  
"What a cheerful guy," Nora commented quietly as they gathered the ingrediants for the potion.   
  
"Yeah, really," Ron agreed. "He brightens all our gloomy lives."  
  
"He fills our souls with glee," Harry added, snickering.  
  
"He's like a ray of golden sunshine," Hermione remarked sarcastically.   
  
"He sings a song of joyful harmony," Elisabeth continued, giggling. "Wow, that sort of rhymed. We're poets!"  
  
"He's looking this way!" Nora murmured. "Shut up!" She poured a beakerfull of rose oil into her cauldron and started stirring vigorously.  
  
"Wow," Hermione said, ignoring Snape's glare, "this potion uses powdered unicorn's horn. That's very powerful."  
  
"It'd take something powerful to make someone fall in love with, for example, Happy Snape over there," Elisabeth commented in a low voice.  
  
"Singing Snape sounds better," Nora argued quietly. "Alliteration. And you said he sang a song of joyful harmony." She added a drop of dragon's blood to her potion.  
  
"Why'd you do that?" Hermione asked, confused. "It didn't say dragon's blood on the list of ingrediants."  
  
"We know," Nora said cheerfully. "But adding dragon's blood to potions always makes them more... interesting..."  
  
"We do it all the time back at home in Potions," Elisabeth agreed. She smiled at Hermione, who still looked worried. "C'mon, it's not like we're going to actually use this potion. And anyway, what about Gleeful Snape?"  
  
Harry stared at Snape, who was glowering around at the students. He doubted that anyone in their right mind would call Snape gleeful.  



	3. Default Chapter Title

HARRY POTTER AND THE UNICORN'S HORN  
Chapter Three: Catfight!  
by Topaz  
  
  
"Well, young Harry," Fred said as Harry raced up to the field, panting, "we've thought long and hard about who should be the Quidditch captain while waiting for you..."  
  
"Don't listen to him." Katie scowled at Fred. "Angelina and Alicia and I thought. He and George practiced Quidditch ballet."  
  
"Quidditch ballet?" Harry stared at them.  
  
"Don't ask," Angelina said. "It's very frightening. Anyway, we narrowed down the selection to a few candidates for captain. Either you, me, Katie, Alicia, Fred, or George."  
  
"So you have no idea who should be captain," Harry remarked.  
  
"Yeah, that's another way of saying it," Alicia agreed. "As for finding a new member, Angelina held tryouts yesterday while you were... uh... I don't know what you were doing. Anyway, she picked out two people to choose our new Keeper from."  
  
"Who?" Harry asked.  
  
"Ginny Weasley, Dennis Creevey, and Hedwig," Katie said. "Alicia doesn't think Hedwig should, but wouldn't she be perfect? She doesn't even need a broomstick!"  
  
"Shut up, Katie," Angelina ordered. "Dennis and Ginny are really good; we haven't had tryouts in years, so we never knew. We all kind of want Ginny, though, partially because Dennis is really annoying, but do you want Creevey instead?"  
  
"No, really, Ginny's fine," Harry said quickly.  
  
"Good." Angelina smiled. "I'll go get her. You guys stay here and practice, I'll be right back." She started jogging toward the castle.   
  
It was great to be back on a Quidditch field, especially in the early morning with the sunrise just coming over the horizon. The cool wind whipped Harry's hair back as he zoomed around, looping the goal posts and nearly crashing into Fred.   
  
Fred and George offered to demonstrate their Quidditch ballet, which was, as Angelina had said, very frightening. They stood on their brooms and did ballet-- or at least, attempted to do ballet-- waving their arms and twirling around as if they were drunk. Fred tried to make his robes look like a tutu, but failed.  
  
Angelina came trotting back with Ginny behind her, looking excited. "Guess what, guys!" she hollered. "There's gonna be a tournament!"  
  
"Yeah!" Ginny agreed. "Dumbledore saw us, and he told us that the Pigpimples students had challenged Hogwarts to a Quidditch match. The Hogwarts teams will play each other-- us and Slytherin, and Hufflepuff versus Ravenclaw. Then the winner of each match will play each other, and the winner of that plays Pigpimples!"  
  
"And wins," Fred. "Imagine Norf on a broomstick."  
  
"Or Misty," Katie suggested. "'Oh, no, I broke a nail!'"  
  
"Bumblekin couldn't get off the ground," George said, snickering.   
  
"Be nice," Angelina ordered. "They've never done anything to you." Fred opened his mouth. "Okay, maybe they have, but that's no reason to be mean." George opened his mouth. "Okay, maybe it is, but be nice anyway!"  
  
"Er, isn't this practice?" Ginny asked. "Are we, you know, going to actually practice?"  
  
"Good idea," Alicia agreed. They all mounted their brooms and took off again.  
  
Ginny was good for being untrained, Harry decided, which wasn't surprising since three of her older brothers had been on the Gryffindor team. She blocked most of the throws the Chasers tried, sometimes turning her broom upside down to get them.  
  
"You're good," Harry said as they landed on the field. "Do you play Quidditch much?"  
  
"Not really," Ginny replied. "But when I was little, Fred and George used to steal my toys and play monkey-in-the-middle all the time. They were taller than me and they cheated, so I got pretty good at catching and blocking." She glared at the twins.  
  
"It was for your own good," George said innocently. "See what we've helped you become? A Gryffindor Seeker!"  
  
"Thanks," Ginny said dryly. "Next time you try to help me, ask first."  
  
  
Ginny became the Gryffindor Seeker, and Angelina was finally chosen to be the team captain. They practiced for about an hour and then went into to have breakfast, pleased with how things had gone.  
  
  
The next day, Harry, Hermione, and Ron went down to visit Hagrid, who was washing Sunny. The gold dragon purred as he polished her scales carefully, her catlike eyes half-closed with contentment.  
  
"Is it just me, or did Sunny shrink?" Harry asked, staring at her. He could've sworn the dragon was larger yesterday. Now she was only a little larger than a good-sized horse.  
  
"She shrank," Hagrid replied. "Professor Trippilyn used an Enlargement Charm so she could carry everyone easily, but she's back ter normal. Want ter help?"  
  
"Er, we'll just watch, shall we?" Ron suggested, edging away from Sunny. The dragon gave him a disgusted look as Hagrid poured some water over her shiny scales, and Hermione giggled.   
  
"Nice draggie," Ron murmured, backing away still farther. "I'll just back away slowly..."  
  
"Don't be such a coward, Ron," Hermione said, still giggling. She reached over and stroked Sunny's neck, ignoring Ron's outrage. "You're a nice, smart, good dragon, aren't you?" she continued in a sugary tone. "Yes, you are. Much smarter than certain redhaired boys who don't have the sense to see that Professor Trippilyn wouldn't let us near anything dangerous."   
  
Ron spluttered angrily. "I'm not a coward, I just have good survival instincts!" he finally managed. "And right now they're telling me not to go any closer to something that could swallow me whole!"  
  
"Ah, finished," Hagrid said happily, setting down his polishing cloth. "See yer later. Got ter go feed th' animals fer next lesson." He ambled off, whistling.  
  
"What do you think next lesson is?" Ron muttered. "Sea monsters? Fanged wildebeest? I wouldn't be at all surprised." He sighed. "He loves having that dragon here. If you ask me, anyone who would go near that monster is a nutcase."  
  
Hermione, who was still standing next to Sunny, gave him a cold look, and Harry laughed. "C'mon, you guys, let's go practice Quidditch. We've still got a few minutes before breakfast."  
  
They turned to leave, and came face to face with Malfoy, Crabbe, and Goyle.   
  
"Fancy meeting you here," Malfoy drawled. "Come to visit your friend the buffle-brained ogre?"  
  
"Speaking of buffle-brained ogres," Harry remarked, staring pointedly at Crabbe and Goyle. Neither of them seemed to get it, but Malfoy glared at him.   
  
"Think you're funny, eh, Potter?" he said softly.  
  
"I was just stating the truth," Harry said innocently. "Wouldn't you agree, Malfoy?"  
  
Malfoy ignored this. "Where's the ogre? Off doing dirty things with his little pets? 'Oh, Skrewtie!'," he mimicked.   
  
"That's disgusting!" Ron yelped, making a face. "He does not... he doesn't do that!"  
  
"Speaking of dirty things," Hermione broke in, smirking, "Katie Bell told me something about your father having an affair... with a Mudblood. Sara Donalds, I believe? And she said it wasn't the first. Does Rita Skeeter sound familiar?"  
  
Malfoy's pale face turned red with fury, and he lunged at Hermione, who swiftly grabbed her bookbag and swung it as hard as she could at Malfoy's stomach. Ron jerked free of Harry and tackled Crabbe; Harry followed him, while Crookshanks held off Goyle, biting and clawing.   
  
Two cats trotted up, one a black cat that Harry didn't recognize, the other Professor Felyn's cat Circe. The black cat watched calmly for a few seconds, then calmly scratched Malfoy; Circe joined Crookshanks.  
  
Hermione yelped in pain as Malfoy seized a fistful of her hair and yanked, still cluching his stomach, his leg bleeding from the cat's scratch. Ron looked up and started to go help her, but Crabbe punched him hard in the nose, and Ron staggered, clutching his head dizzily. Harry tackled Crabbe as hard as he could, which wasn't very, and Crabbe seized his throat, choking him.  
  
The black cat looked on as Hermione and Draco struggled, then scratched Draco again and leaped over to help Circe and Crookshanks. Malfoy yanked harder, and Hermione screamed. He grinned triumphantly, but seconds later Hermione gave him a tremendous kick between the legs, and he collapsed on the grass, moaning.   
  
Professor McGonagall and Professor Felyn walked up.   
  
They all froze; Hermione stopped massaged her scalp, the cats paused, Crabbe loosened his grip on Harry's neck and, Ron dropped to the ground, still holding his head, and even Malfoy stopped moaning and looked up.  
  
"What," Professor McGonagall said, her voice trembling with fury, "is the meaning of this?"  
  
No one answered. Ron and Malfoy slowly clambered to their feet, both wincing with pain.  
  
"This is a disgrace to Hogwarts!" Professor McGonagall said furiously. "Brawling on school grounds like drunken Muggles, you all could have been seriously injured!"  
  
Harry thought, but did not say, that in his opinion, they were seriously injured. From the way his neck felt, he'd have a sore throat for weeks. Goyle was bleeding from a multitude of scratches, Ron looked like he had a concussion, and Malfoy... Harry stifled a grin.  
  
"One hundred points from both Gryffindor and Slytherin," Professor McGonagall continued, glowering. "Detention for all of you. And if I ever hear of something of this nature again, I will make sure that all of you are expelled."  
  
Professor Felyn was watching the cats. "Circe," she said sternly. Circe looked up, and Harry could have sworn the cat looked guilty. She walked over to Professor Felyn, purring apologetically, and Professor Felyn lifted her onto one shoulder, where Circe draped a paw around her neck.  
  
"Is that one yours?" Professor McGonagall inquired. She continued without waiting for an answer. "The ginger cat is yours, Miss Granger? Elana, is the black one yours, too?"  
  
"You might say that," Professor Felyn replied in a voice that sounded like she was trying not to laugh. "In a way, I suppose." The cat bounded off, tail held high.   
  
Professor McGonagall looked back at the students, her expression livid. "Your detentions will be this evening after dinner. Now, get out of my sight." Ron started to open his mouth, but Harry and Hermione seized his arms and dragged him away. Malfoy, Crabbe, and Goyle followed them sullenly. As they left, Harry heard Professor McGonagall saying, "...terribly sorry you had to see that, Elana..."  
  
The group turned a corner, and Harry could no longer hear Professor McGonagall. They all stopped, as if on cue, and he and Hermione released Ron.   
  
Malfoy half-turned, glaring malevolently, and hissed, "I'll get you for that one, Mudblood," before he, Crabbe, and Goyle limped away.  
  
Ron burst into laughter. "Did you see the look on his face when Hermione kicked him? HA! Great job, Hermione, couldn't've done better myself. Wait'll I tell Fred and George..."  
  
Harry had to grin; Ron's enthusiasm was infectious. But Hermione seemed gloomy. "We just lost one hundred points from Gryffindor, Malfoy ripped my sleeve, and I'll probably have a bald spot--"  
  
"Who cares?" Ron howled. "I'd rip out all my hair to see that again. And Slytherin lost a hundred points, too. He'll think twice before taking us on again..."  
  
"Well, we still have detention," Hermione argued.   
  
"You got detention, Hermione?" Fred and George had walked up behind them without anyone noticing. "How?"  
  
Ron, still grinning broadly, recounted the story for the twins, and later for the entire Gryffindor common room. The Gryffindors, who all hated Slytherins, were delighted, and Ron still hooted with laughter whenever he thought about Malfoy's expression while being kicked, but Harry, underneath his cheerful attitude, couldn't help but share Hermione's uneasiness. Malfoy wasn't going to let them get away unscathed.   
  
  
Hagrid was waiting for them that evening when Harry, Ron, and Hermione went off for their detentions. Malfoy, Crabbe, and Goyle were already with him.  
  
"Hello, Harry, Hermione, Ron," Hagrid said. "Goin' ter go inter the Forbidden Forest for yer detentions. Bin havin' some problems with t'griffins lately."  
  
"What kind of problems?" Malfoy said, and Harry was pleased to see that he looked nervous.  
  
Hagrid shrugged. "Nothin' much, they've just bin killin' more'n usual."  
  
"Oh, yeah, that's nothing much," Ron muttered in Harry's ear.   
  
"What's a griffin?" Harry asked.  
  
"Griffins have the body, legs, and tail of a lion and the head and wings of an eagle," Hermione recited. "They are highly intelligent and can produce a wide range of sounds. Female griffins--"  
  
"Erm, I'll tell ye when we get back," Hagrid said quickly, holding up a hand to stop Hermione's response. "C'mon, let's go."  
  
Malfoy stood rooted to the spot. "Last time you brought us in the Forbidden Forest we barely came out alive!"  
  
"Pity he came out alive at all," Hermione murmured.  
  
"Yer goin' in or yer leavin' Hogwarts," Hagrid snapped. "Are ye comin' or not?"  
  
"Coming," Malfoy said sulkily, following reluctantly as Hagrid led them into the forest.   
  
The full moon lit the forest in a pale silvery glow, and Hagrid decided not to use light. Instead they tramped along in a large group, using the moonlight to tell where they were going. After about five minutes had gone by and they'd seen nothing, Malfoy started to get restless.  
  
"What's the point of coming here, anyway?" he asked irritably. "To get us eaten by vicious griffins?"  
  
"Hush up or ye will be," Hagrid said. "An' good riddance." Harry and Ron smirked, but Hermione wasn't listening. She was staring off into the woods.   
  
Malfoy kicked a tree angrily, then howled with pain. "My toe! It's broken!"  
  
Ron burst into laughter, and Harry joined him, while Malfoy kept howling like a wounded hyena. "Stupid tree! My foot is broken!"  
  
"Hush up!" Hagrid said loudly, looking alarmed. "They'll hear ye!" Sure, enough, an eerie screetch echoed through the forest, and a pair of fierce amber eyes peered at them from the bushes.  
  
"Griffin," Hagrid breathed, keeping his eyes on the shadowy form. "Malfoy, Harry, back up, will ye? I'll handle it."  
  
But the griffin that stepped into the clearing clearly wasn't looking for food. Its surprisingly expressive face looked, from what Harry could tell, happy to see them. The griffin bounded over to Hagrid and began batting him around gently with its large paws.  
  
Harry cast a startled glance at Ron and Hermione, both of whom looked just as surprised as him. Malfoy was still rubbing his toe and muttering grumpily under his breath.  
  
"Griffy!" Hagrid shouted happily. "Great ter see ye!"  
  
"He's friends with that?" Ron said shrilly, gaping at them.   
  
The griffin stopped batting Hagrid around and nuzzled him happily, then tossed its head and settled down, stretching both wings and yawning.  
  
"This is Griffy, an' old friend o' mine," Hagrid said, beaming at the griffin. "'E's a griffin."  
  
"We realize that," Malfoy said in a squeaky sort of voice.   
  
Hagrid looked up and saw the four of them staring nervously at Griffy. "Oh, don' worry, 'e's perfectly friendly. Griffins'er like people, some'er dangerous and some aren't." Ignoring Malfoy's and Ron's incredulous expressions, he turned back to the griffin. "Summat wrong, Griffy?"  
  
The griffin tugged gently on Hagrid's sleeve and tried to pull him into the forest, making odd whining noises. Harry had the odd feeling that he was inside an episode of Lassie gone wrong.   
  
"Come on, I think Griffy's tryin' ter tell us summat," Hagrid urged, following the lithe golden creature through the trees. Hermione joined him, looking as though she was dying to ask some questions about griffins.  
  
Griffy led them down a twisty path that seemed to have been made by horse-like creatures; probably unicorns. Harry had to pant to keep up; Griffy was fast, and he didn't seem to realize that the humans weren't in quite as good shape. Finally they reached a small cave covered with moss and dead leaves.  
  
"Wait here," Hagrid ordered. "I'll see what's inside." He bent over and stepped into the gaping hole.  
  
For a few moments the only noise they could hear was the sound of each others' breathing. Then Hagrid's head reappeared. "Dead unicorn."  
  
"Oh, dead unicorn," Ron said, looking relieved. "I thought-- a DEAD UNICORN?"  
  
"Yeh," Hagrid said. "Mebbe I was wrong about t'griffins killin' things. No griffin could kill a unicorn-- an' there's none as would wan' to." Hagrid pulled his head back inside. "Hey, there's a--"  
  
A small, pure white shape stumbled out of the cave, and a pair of large purple eyes looked up.   
  
"A baby unicorn!" Hermione squealed, kneeling down in front of it. "It's adorable!"  
  
Hagrid reamerged from the cave, his hands stained with silvery blood. "Yeh, a baby unicorn. Careful ye don'... oh."  
  
"Don't what?" Hermione looked up, still stroking the silky white foal.   
  
"Don't look it in th' eyes," Hagrid finished weakly. "Ye've just imprinted it, Hermione."  
  
  
To Hermione's delight, Crookshanks took an immediate liking to the foal, and the baby unicorn to him. Ron wasn't quite as enthusiastic, but Harry agreed with Hermione that she was adorable, and certainly very friendly.   
  
Hermione fed the unicorn, at Hagrid's suggestion, on a mixture made of cream, eggs, honey, and cinnamin, which the house elves gladly supplied her with. Dumbledore, after hearing what had happened, agreed that Hermione could keep Taylis-- what she named the baby-- in her dorm as long as she cleaned up after her.   
  
Basically everyone seemed utterly charmed by the little unicorn-- everyone except Ron, after finding that Taylis had chewed up one of his hats and receiving a sharp kick in the shin when he tried to pull the tattered remains away.   
  
"She's just a baby," Hermione said cheerfully, stroking Taylis's small gold horn.  
  
"She's vicious," Ron retorted.  
  
"She doesn't know any better," Hermione replied, smiling lovingly at Taylis. Ron tossed the scraps that were all that was left of his hat into the trash bin and didn't say another word to Hermione for the rest of the evening.  
  
  
*Evil grin* I'm so mean to Ron. But he deserves it... anyway, to all you people out there who are H/H (or H/D) I'm sorry, but since the books are obviously much more R/H I'm sticking to that. And I'm not going to have them making out in public or anything and rub it in your face.   
  
Coming soon... Nora and Elisabeth throw a Halloween party! Woohoo!  



	4. Default Chapter Title

HARRY POTTER AND THE UNICORN'S HORN  
Chapter Four: The Halloween Bash  
by Topaz  
  
Er... reading the first three might help since otherwise you might be confused. This is my version of the fifth book. Sort of J. K. Rowling after a few too many shots of whiskey. *Evil grin* But just a few, don't worry. Anyhoo, a group of students from the American wizarding school (Nora, Elisabeth, Norf, Syris, Aduro, Misty, and Butch) had come to visit Hogwarts for half of the year. Just thought I'd warn you. Please suggest ways to plug the plot holes, the story is full of them. :-(  
  
  
Because it was Halloween, they got a free period, and a group of fifth and six year girls from all of the houses gathered in the Ravenclaw common room, talking and trying on robes for the party Nora and Elisabeth had announced they would throw. They called it the Halloween Bash.  
  
"I can't wait till the Halloween Bash," Parvati said dreamily. "Dean Thomas asked me, and I've got my new hot pink robes to wear--"  
  
"Hot pink? What are you, Barbie?" Pansy Parkinson sneered, and Parvati turned the same bright pink color as her robes. "Whatever, Patil."  
  
"At least she has a date other than Malfoy," Lavendar snapped. The Slytherins glowered at her.  
  
"Who're you going with, Granger?" Pansy inquired, changing the subject hastily. "Your friend Potty? Weasel?"  
  
"Bet she's going with Longbottom," Millicent Bulstrode sneered.  
  
"I'm not, but you're probably going with Goyle," Hermione said angrily. "You two are a perfect couple."  
  
Millicent snarled, but Angelina, Katie, and Alicia glared so menacingly at her that she subsided.  
  
"I'm going with Fred again," Angelina said quickly, trying to smooth over the tension.  
  
"Good luck," Katie said fervently. "You'll need it."  
  
"I'm going with David," Alicia announced, giggling. "He finally asked me."  
  
"Aduro Ventulus asked me to the dance," Katie announced importantly. The others stared at me. "What?" she said defensively. "You don't think I'm good enough for him?"  
  
"Yeah, that's it," Angelina said, "we think you're beneath him. You're scum, Katie, scum! You're not fit to kiss my boots."  
  
"No one's fit to kiss your boots," Katie said, grinning. "Even the strongest person would keel over in a dead faint at the faintest whiff."  
  
Pansy, Millicent, and the other Slytherin girls stared. Katie crossed her eyes and stuck her tongue out at them. "Is there a problem, girls? You think we're crazy? Is that it? Well, guess what! You're right! Can we get back to the subject now?"  
  
"There was one?" Lavendar looked confused. "Oh, the dance." She grinned smugly. "Seamus asked me."  
  
"Surprise, surprise," Angelina murmured. "I think I'll die of shock."  
  
"Good riddance," Katie told her.   
  
By then, most of the Slytherins had left. Lisa Turpin, Morgan Sporkle and Hannah Abbott were trying on robes while the Gryffindor girls chatted. Angelina was lying on her stomach, Katie was in a meditating pose, Alicia was sprawled on the floor, humming, Hermione was curled up with Crookshanks, and Parvati and Lavendar were applying eye liner in front of a mirror.  
  
"So, Hermi," Parvati said, contorting her face into weird positions as she smeared on blush, "who're you going with?"  
  
"No one, yet," Hermione replied. "There's still a few days left before the ball."  
  
"Go with Crookshanks," Angelina suggested.  
  
"Good idea!" Katie agreed. "Cats are much smarter than most boys. And all the Hogwarts guys are losers, anyway. Maybe I should go with Hooty, he's my owl, and he's adorable."  
  
"Ron's owl is cute," Angelina remarked. "Maybe I'll ask him. And 'Mione, if you're not going with Crookshanks, I'll ditch Fred and go with him."  
  
Crookshanks eyed her disdainfully and yawned.  
  
"Fine, be that way," Angelina said to him. "Snob.   
  
"He's not stuck up, he just has good taste," Katie told her, leaning over to rub Crookshanks's fluffy head. "I wouldn't go out with you, either, if I were him." She grinned when the cat began to purr.  
  
"Men," Angelina said, shaking her head disgustedly. "So, what do you guys think of the Pigpimplians?"  
  
"The Langley twins are funny," Katie remarked.   
  
"They're horrible to poor Binkleman, though," Alicia said, shaking her head. "They tease him all the time. Syris Frostsilver seems nice enough; she's kind of quiet, but after hanging out with you two chatterboxes that's a nice change."  
  
"Bumblekin is a moron," said Morgan, joining the conversation. "And that girl Misty is a real jerk. But Aduro Ventulus is really cute..."  
  
"I know!" Katie gushed. "He's so hot, I can't believe he asked me to the ball."  
  
Morgan and Lisa sighed enviously. "I think the twins are kind of weird," Lisa said, frowning at her reflection as she tugged white silk robes over her head. "I wish they'd brought more boys; Aduro is the only cute guy from Pigpimples."  
  
Angelina shrugged. "You guys, want to go practice Quidditch? Katie and Alicia and Morgan and I have to get in shape for Quidditch season, and there's spares for the rest of you."  
  
"I can't come," Alicia said reluctantly. "I still have to finish my essay for Professor Binns. Have fun."  
  
"I'll come," Hermione agreed.  
  
"What?" Katie gasped, putting one hand on her heart. "Hermione Granger, winner of the Most Studious Award, is going to... she's going to... play Quidditch? This is a historic moment!" Hermione blushed and threw a pillow at her.  
  
"We can't," Hannah said, gesturing at Lisa. "We still need robes for the ball. See you guys." The girls trooped out of the school and headed for the Quidditch field, chattering happily.  
  
  
The Halloween Bash was coming up a few days-- the twins had insisted on it being three days after Halloween for no particular reason-- and Harry still didn't have a date. Bored to death in History of Magic, Ron and Harry discussed the approaching dance.  
  
"Tell you what," said Ron, whose ideas were getter wilder and wilder, "You can dress up as a girl and go with me. Then we don't have to find dates."  
  
"How about you dress up as a girl?" Harry suggested. "Besides, I'd rather go with a real girl, no offense meant."  
  
"None taken, I would too," Ron said. "Hm... shall I write Mrs. Dursley and ask her to be your date?"  
  
Harry screamed, and Professor Binns looked up. "Potter?"  
  
"Bit my tongue," Harry said quickly.   
  
"Ah, yes," Binns mumbled, looking back down at his notes. "Aderic the Dragonslayer was eaten in 700, by a particularly fierce dragon named Petunia. He stopped killing dragons after that." Someone giggled.   
  
Ron choked. "Petunia! Your aunt! It's destined to be!"  
  
"Don't be sick," Harry snapped, thoroughly disgusted. "Hermione? Are you going with Krum this year, or are you free?"  
  
"Krum is in Bulgaria," Hermione replied, missing his sarcasm.   
  
"So you can go with Ron," Harry said. "And I'll... I'll..."  
  
"Ginny doesn't have a date," Ron suggested. "Shall I ask her? She'd definitely say yes."  
  
"Yeah, thanks," Harry said.   
  
"Elisabeth is going with Norf," Hermione remarked, scribbling down something about Albert the Addled. "I think George asked Nora."  
  
"They're a good couple," Ron said, shaking his head. "A pair of nutcases. Imagine if they got married... the kids would be psychopaths..." He shuddered. "Thank god for birth control."  
  
Ron said the last sentence particularly loudly, and received several startled stares from the students sitting around them. His ears turned red.  
  
  
Harry, Ron, and Norf stepped out onto the 'dance floor', which was a section of the lawn that Elisabeth and Nora had sectioned off. The edges were strung with flashing Christmas lights, and very loud music was blaring from large speakers set up all over it. Students were scattered all over it, talking, laughing, and dancing. Pizza, potato chips, Pumpkin Pastries, pumpkin juice, and Bertie Bott's Every Flavored Beans were set out on tables for them to eat.   
  
"I don't believe this," Ron muttered, tugging at the sleeve of his robes. "They're nuts. Absolutely, completely, and totally nuts. Christmas lights? For a Halloween dance?"  
  
"We already knew they were nuts," Norf said, looking distracted. "Where's Elisabeth?"  
  
"Forget her, where's Ginny?" Harry asked.  
  
Ron rolled his eyes. "You guys can't even find your dates. Pitiful."  
  
"And you can find yours?"   
  
Ron snorted. "Of course I can find her." He looked around. He paused, frowned, and looked around again. "Erm..."  
  
"You can't find her." Harry grinned. "This is sad."  
  
They walked out onto the dance area, trying to ignore the colorful lights that blinked and twinkled, and immediately their ears were assaulted by very loud, very angry music.  
  
"Nora," Norf grumbled. "She loves hard rock."  
  
Ron winced. "This is... loud..."  
  
To Harry's immense relief, he suddenly spotted Ginny, Hermione, Elisabeth, Nora, Syris, and Katie Bell grouped together around the fountain, which had been bewitched to spout soda instead of water. (Now, THAT'S a soda fountain. Lame, huh?)   
  
"Hey, guys!" Nora shrieked, waving wildly. Harry noticed with great relief that she and Elisabeth wore different colored robes so he could tell them apart; Nora's were made of a mirror-like material that reflected everything, and Elisabeth's seemed to have Christmas lights strung through the cloth. She looked like a Christmas tree.  
  
"Ow." Norf winced and looked away. "That hurts my eyes. Why can't they wear normal clothes?"  
  
Hermione noticed them and hurried over. "Hi, I couldn't find you guys, where were you? Isn't the music cool?" By then another song had started.  
  
"Cool?" Ron repeated, stunned. "This music? Crikey, Hermione, are you mad?"  
  
"I like it," she said, unruffled.   
  
"It's called Rockefella Skank, by Fat Boy Slim," Nora informed them. "Muggle music. Hey, Ron, like 'Mione's robes? She borrowed them from me."  
  
Hermione's robes were different pastel colors: pink, lavendar, blue, green, and gold, swirled around. Harry blinked. The colors changed whenever the light changed; it made him dizzy.  
  
"You have weird taste in clothes, Nora," Syris said, joining them. She was wearing black satin robes with gold embroidery around the edges. "And music. Although I do like this song."  
  
"I hate it," Elisabeth said, joining them. "'N sync is much better."  
  
"They're stupid," Nora snapped. "And Justin looks like a girl."  
  
Elisabeth gave a shriek of outrage. "He does not, he's the hottest guy in the world!"  
  
"He looks more like a girl than Britney Spears does," Nora continued. "And he can't sing. He sounds like a dying cow with laryngitis." Elisabeth socked her in the cheek, and she punched Elisabeth in the stomach.   
  
"Muggle singers," Hermione murmured to Ron, Katie, and Ginny, who looked confused.  
  
By then the song had ended, and another began.   
  
"Nooo!" Nora shrieked. "I hate this song! 'N sync sucks!" She and Elisabeth walked away, arguing heatedly, and dragging Norf along with them.   
  
"Erm, want to dance?" Harry asked Ginny. She nodded, her face bright red. It sort of clashed with her hair.   
  
Ron was the same shade of color. "No way am I dancing," he said quickly to Hermione. "I'll fall flat on my face."  
  
Hermione rolled her eyes. "That is so immature, Ron."  
  
"It's not my fault I can't dance!" Ron said defensively.   
  
"Oh, sure," Hermione drawled sarcastically. "Ron, it's a dance. People dance at dances."  
  
"Not me," Ron said stubbornly.  
  
Hermione looked exasperated.  
  
"C'mon," Harry muttered to Ginny, "let's get out of here." They stepped onto the dance 'floor' and started dancing rather awkwardly. Ginny's face looked like a stop sign-- almost as bright as Elizabeth's robes. Harry was delighted to find that she was almost as bad a dancer as he was, although both of them were ballerinas compared to Crabbe and Goyle.   
  
Out of the corner of his eye Harry saw Nora swirl by with Fred, her mirror robes distorting the whole scene reflected in them. Katie was dancing with Aduro, who was wearing bright green robes with red and gold flames decorating them. All of the Pigpimples students wore robes with some kind of decoration; beside them the plain robes of the Hogwarts students looked... plain.  
  
Misty Darkmoon danced by them with Roger Davies, and Ron's head turned to watch. Misty looked gorgeous; her emerald green robes matched her eyes, and the gold trim and embroidery matched the gold ribbon in her long, shiny black hair.  
  
"Please don't drool on me," Hermione said coldly to Ron.  
  
"I wasn't-- huh?"  
  
Hermione rolled her eyes and sighed dramatically. Harry and Ginny moved to another part of the dance floor.   
  
"Hey, y'all," said a very loud voice. Every head turned to where Nora and Fred sat at the DJ's table, grinning insanely. "I'm your new DJ, Elisabeth Langley."  
  
"I'm Elisabeth!" Elisabeth shrieked angrily.  
  
"Okay, I'm Nora. Anyway, from now on there will be NO boy bands, Britney Spears, Christina Aguliera, Mandy Moore, Jessica Simpson, and all those other stupid people." Nora glared at Elisabeth, who glared back. "And now... Break Stuff, by Limp Bizkit!"  
  
"This sucks!" Elisabeth screeched.  
  
"Justin looks like a girl!" Nora hollered into the magical voice amplifier, making everyone wince.  
  
Ginny looked at Harry, her expression extremely confused.  
  
"At Pigpimples, most people use Muggle stuff," Syris said, coming up behind them. Ginny jumped in surprise. "Computers, TVs, stuff like that. And we listen to Muggle music a lot. It's kinda weird, coming to Hogwarts-- you guys treat Muggle stuff like it's junk or something, but you oughta try using the Internet... even wizards haven't come up with anything better."  
  
"My father's obsessed with Muggle stuff," Ginny remarked.  
  
"He should come to Pigpimples. Well, have fun. I'd better go stop Nora and Elisabeth from doing us all a favor and killing each other." She smiled at them and set off toward Elisabeth, who was throwing potato chips at Nora.   
  
"Ron!" Hermione shrieked.  
  
"No!" Ron's face was almost as red as Ginny's.   
  
"Fine!" Hermione whirled around and flounced away, leaving Ron glaring behind her. Harry saw her scoop a cup of soda from the fountain and sip it, pointedly staring in the other direction. Ron looked crushed.  
  
"They're not getting along very well, are they," Ginny observed. "Ron's so childish."  
  
"Yeah," Harry agreed. "But it's not his fault."  
  
Ginny sighed. "He and Hermione are such a cute couple, if only..."  
  
"...they'd stop bickering," Harry finished. "But I doubt that that will ever happen."  
  
Hermione turned her head slightly to look at Ron, and her expression changed from snobby to worried when she saw Ron's downcast face. Ron, noticing her turn, immediately turned around and started chatting with Lavendar. Hermione glared at his back.  
  
"Hey, Harry!" Nora shouted into the magical voice amplifier. "Wassssuuuppppp?"  
  
Harry and Ginny stared at each other, than back at Nora. "Huh?"  
  
"Never mind," Nora said blithely. "You Brits. So oblivious."  
  
Ginny shrugged. "Wanna get something to drink, Harry?"  
  
"Sure." Harry led her over to one of the fountains, which was spouting cream soda. He dipped two cups in and handed one to Ginny, then sat down on the edge of the fountain next to her. "How do you like the ball so far?"  
  
"It's... loud..." Ginny winced as Nora cranked up the volume yet again. "But I'm having a good time. Other than Ron."  
  
Draco Malfoy walked over to Hermione and said something to her. She stared at him, then shrugged, and they walked onto the dance floor. Ron's jaw dropped.  
  
"My god." Ginny stood up, trying to peer over people's heads. "Is Hermione dancing with Malfoy?"  
  
She was. Harry felt his own jaw drop, and he turned to catch Ron's reaction. Ron's expression was horrified, furious, humiliated, revolted, and hurt all rolled into one. Hermione looked slightly smug, and Malfoy looked very smug. Both of them were watching Ron out of the corners of their eyes.  
  
"C'mon." Ginny tugged at Harry's sleeve. "Let's go cheer up Ron." She pulled him through the crowds of dancing people, at least half of whom were watching Hermione and Malfoy out of the corners of their eyes.  
  
Ron's mouth was still open. "She's nuts," he said to Harry as they approached him. "She's lost it." He stared resentfully at Malfoy. "He's just trying to make me mad."  
  
"I think it worked," Harry said tactfully, eyeing Ron's livid face. "Look, Ron, why don't--"  
  
"Leave me alone," Ron snapped, brushing past Harry. He stomped away, ignoring the whispering students who were now looking at him, and disappeared behind the school.   
  
  
Oh, poor Ron! *Hugs Ron* Well, we'll see what will happen next... and guess what! I'm not going to annoy you by asking you to review! Wow, I'm so nice... yeah, right... ^_^  



	5. Default Chapter Title

HARRY POTTER AND THE UNICORN'S HORN  
Chapter Five: Foul Play  
by Topaz  
  
Because I am exceptionally lazy, I didn't bother to check and see if J. K. said the names of the Slytherin Quidditch team. I just made up my own names. We'll just pretend that her Chasers graduated already. Okies? Okies. Proceed.  
  
  
That day Gryffindor was scheduled to play against Slytherin in the Quidditch Tournament. Harry, as he swung onto his Firebolt, couldn't help but wonder how Ginny would do as Keeper in the first game of the season.  
  
Lee Jordan, commentator for the match, was very excited. "And, finally, the game we've all been waiting for, the smashing Gryffindor team against the stinking Slytherins!"  
  
"JORDAN!" Professor McGonagall shrieked.  
  
"And it starts off- Katie Bell with the Quaffle, heading for the goal, and OH! she scores... funny, Slytherin didn't try to knock her off her broom or anything. And-- darn, Slytherin scores. Go Angelina! Blast that stupid Beater off his broom! And Potter is almost decapitated by a Bludger..."  
  
Harry barely saw the Bludger in time, and he flung himself sideways so that the Bludger missed him by a few inches. Alicia scored another goal for Gryffindor.  
  
Seconds later a second Bludger pelted by his ear, another near miss. The Slytherin Beater grinned at him and dove under Fred's furious swing.  
  
"And Slytherin scores... what a pity."  
  
"Jordan, you are supposed to be unbiased."  
  
"I am," Lee protested indignantly. He paused. "What does 'unbiased' mean?"  
  
Next a Bludger slammed into Katie, sending her flying. George, seeing this, zoomed over, and Katie landed on him. There was an interesting ensuing struggle with Katie grabbing for the broom handle, George yelling that she was pulling his hair, and the broom doing a crazy sort of shimmy as it was jerked this way and that. Harry caught Katie's broom for her and the game continued.  
  
"I didn't know Slytherin's Beaters were this good," Angelina muttered to Harry as she flew by. "They must've been working out a lot. They're hitting it harder than even Fred and George can."  
  
Next Harry, attempting to avoid a speeding Bludger as he circled the Gryffindor goal, nearly crashed into the stands. He had a brief glimpse of a pair of second year boys shrieking, and then Ginny pulled his broom back to safety. She turned bright red when he thanked her.  
  
By then, Gryffindor, despite the Slytherin Beaters, was up 30 points. Fred happened to mention it to Michael Wycliff, one of the Beaters, and Mike prompty slammed a Bludger at Ginny. She squeaked and dove out of the way, smacking right into a goalpost. The Slytherins hooted with laughter.  
  
"We're going to get killed," Katie remarked cheerfully to no one in particular. "See you guys in Hell. Death by Bludger... that would be an interesting movie."  
  
Slytherin scored again, and Draco Malfoy sneered at Harry. George whacked a Bludger toward his head, and Malfoy screamed, kicking his broom out of the way. Harry grinned, enjoying the outraged and humiliated look on Malfoy's face.  
  
Then, out of the corner of his eyes Harry saw a flash of gold. He whirled his broom around and dove forward, but Malfoy was closer. They zoomed closer, then--  
  
WHAM! A Bludger smashed into Harry's broom, sending him spinning off in dizzying circles. Malfoy reached forward and snatched the Snitch, circling triumphantly above Harry.   
  
"And Slytherin wins," Lee said, sounding defeated. "An excellent game played by the Beaters."  
  
The Gryffindors floated to the ground, looking depressed. Harry checked to make sure that his Firebolt was undamaged, then joined them.  
  
"Well," Angelina said gloomily, "we did the best we could."  
  
"I still can't believe they could hit those Bludgers so hard!" Fred said in frusteration. "We shoulda blocked that one, then Harry could've got the Snitch."  
  
Ginny said nothing, but looking dejected. Hermione and Ron joined them, with Taylis wobbling behind Hermione on her unsteady, too-long legs. They looked glum as well.  
  
"Nice try, Potter, but I guess you weren't a match for the Slytherin team," Draco Malfoy sneered, landing his broom in front of Harry. "Poor little Gryffindors..." The rest of the Slytherin team landed next to him, smirking triumphantly.  
  
Taylis let out a shrill whinny and reared up, pawed the air with her golden hooves. "Taylis?" Hermione said, surprised. "What's wrong?" She stroked Taylis's neck, trying to calm her down, but the foal pulled away, neighing loudly, and touched her small horn to Hermione's hand.  
  
"Hey!" Hermione said, looking started.   
  
"What?" Ron asked, staring at her.  
  
"I can... wow!" Hermione said. "Calm down, Taylis, calm down... hey! I can understand her feelings... she's upset..."  
  
"No, really," Ron said sarcastically. "So, you two can speak mind to mind?"  
  
"Not speak," Hermione said, ignoring his sarcasm. "She doesn't know English yet. But she's very upset..."  
  
"You're like Trelawney," Harry said. "Pointing out the extremely obvious."  
  
Hermione glared at them. "Look, shut up. She says... I thinks she's saying the Beaters are crazy."  
  
"We know that," Ron said. "All Slytherins are."  
"No... wait!" Hermione cried.  
  
"We're waiting," Harry said helpfully.  
  
"They're on drugs!" Hermione said dramatically, pointing at the two annoyed Beaters. Everyone stared at her. "Oh, well, not drugs, but I think she's saying they're on steroids or something..."  
  
Everyone was still staring at her. "Loony," said one of the Chasers, shaking his head. Taylis snorted at him.   
  
Professor Dumbledore was coming toward them, and Hermione darted off to speak to him. The Slytherins glared at her, and, as Taylis followed Hermione, she stepped very hard on Malfoy's foot.  
  
"Owwww!" Malfoy howled. "Stupid little-- Ah, hello, Professor."   
  
"I believe you were saying something?" Dumbledore said innocently, his eyes twinkling. "Do continue, Mr. Malfoy."  
  
"Ugh..." Malfoy couldn't seem to think of anything to say. "Erm... hello."  
  
"Hello," Dumbledore agreed. "Now, Mr. Wycliff, Mr. Brooke, Miss Granger has reporting a very interesting idea. She claims that her unicorn says that you two have been using steroids."  
  
"Oh, and if the unicorn says it, it must be true," Malfoy muttered, rubbing his foot.  
  
"There's a very simple spell that will prove your innocence... or guilt. It makes anyone who has used an illegal substance glow," Dumbledore said, taking his wand out of his pocket and smiling cheerfully at the two Beaters, who were now the color of slightly sour milk.  
  
"Er..." said Wycliff. "That's really all right, Professor. We're, uh, late for next class."  
  
"It'll take just a second," Dumbledore beamed. "Revealicus stimulus!"  
  
The two Beaters began to glow. Fourteen pairs of astonished eyes turned to stare at Taylis, who was looking as smug as an innocent baby unicorn could. Hermione, beside her, looked even more smug.   
  
Dumbledore smiled, but his smile was a good deal less friendly than usual. "Wycliff, Brooke, you will receive suspensions and possible expulsions for this incident. Drugs, magical and otherwise, are against school rules, and the Ministry of Magic will have to be involved. All of you," he continued, looking around at the wide-eyed Gryffindors and Slytherins, "should know that there are severe penalties for using drugs."  
  
  
Insert Eminem: So see children drugs are bad, and if you don't believe me ask your dad, and if you don't believe him ask your mom, she'll tell you how she does them all the time...  
Mrs. Weasley: WHAT!!  
Eminem: Um... bye. *Runs away, chased by a ladle-wielding Mrs. Weasley*  
Sorry about that. I couldn't resist.  
  
  
"And Gryffindor wins the match by default!" Lee shrieked in the voice amplifier, making everyone wince. "WAHOO! Er, sorry, Professor McGonagall."  
  
"Quite all right, Jordan," she said with an exasperated sigh.   
  
"We won!" Ginny squealed, flinging her arms around Ron, who gave a startled grunt as she cut off his air supply.   
  
"Ginny, I'm suffocated, don't squeeze so hard," Ron gasped, trying her pry her off.   
  
"We won!" Alicia shrieked, hugging Katie and Angelina. Katie was waving her hat around, and accidentally smacked Fred in the nose. He stumbled backward into George, who landed on Harry, who landed on the ground.  
  
"Oof," Harry grunted, trying to shove the twins off of him. They were surprisingly heavy.   
  
"Fred, you need to lose weight," George muttered. "I'd suggest Slimfast." He started talking in a high-pitched, feminine voice. "Ah used Slimfast and ah lost fifty pounds in two days! Slimfast raylly works!"   
  
"We won!" Gryffindors were shouting everywhere. Ravenclaws and Hufflepuffs cheered also; the Slytherins looked glum.  
  
"Yay!" Angelina was shrieking happily. She grabbed Fred and swung him around, then let go. He went spinning off and crashed into George.  
  
"That's the second time ye've stepped on me foot," George said in a funny accent. He received several strange looks. "I mean, OOF!"  
  
"Gryffindor will receive Slytherin's points!" Professor McGonagall called above the cheering students. "180 points to Gryffindor!"  
  
This time the cheering was even louder. Hermione hugged Ron, and then they both blushed. Katie jumped onto her broom and started doing aeriel cartwheels until she accidentally let go and landed on a very surprised Professor McGonagall.  
  
"Er, sorry, Professor," Katie said, rubbing her elbow where it had connected with McGonagall's head.   
  
"Quite all right," Professor McGonagall said faintly, massaging her skull. Her glasses had been knocked sideways on her nose, and her hair was yanked out of its neat bun. She looked ridiculous.   
  
"You know what this means, right?" Fred shouted.   
  
"PARTY!" Nora and Elisabeth screamed.   
  
  
The next morning Harry was a wreck. The Gryffindors had stayed up late into the late drinking caffeinated beverages and eating potato chips to celebrate their victory. The Pigpimplians joined them, but were kicked out after Nora and Elisabeth got into a mustard-squirting match with each other and Syris dumped ketchup on them both.  
  
He hauled himself out of his nice, warm, comfy bed and staggered to his feet. Beside him Ron and Seamus looked even worse; Dean looked just fine.   
  
"How can you be awake, Dean?" Seamus croaked, rubbing his eyes.  
  
"My metabolism," Dean said. "And I drank an Energizing potion." He grinned at them.   
  
Ron's hair was a mess, sticking up in orange tufts all over his head, and his eyes were half-closed. "I think Fred and George spiked the soda," he announced before tripping and falling onto the floor. Ten seconds later he yelped in pain.  
  
"That was a delayed reaction," Dean remarked. "C'mon, let's go to breakfast."  
  
"I hate you," Seamus said. "You're awake."  
  
  
I realize that the Gryffindor Chasers are kind of out of character, but, being the responsible and accurate author that I am, I don't really care. 


End file.
